Gleeden is an app for extra-marital dating “created by women”. It boasts of over 5.2 mn members world-wide. The site boasts of being run entirely by a 100% female team. And interestingly women have free membership on this site. Men, on the other hand, have to pay using a credit-based mechanism.
Gleeden had entered India in 2017 and 30% of their users are married women in the age group of 34-49 years. Of the over 500,000 users in India for the app, 20 per cent men and 13 per cent women admitted they were cheating.
Extra-marital in India
They did a study world-wide and the results from India are shocking. The study said that 7 out of 10 Indian married women cheated on their husbands.
Please also read about how women, when they get power also go for sexual abuse.
Around 77% of the married women shared that they had cheated on their husbands because their relationship was monotonous. Another main reason was that their husbands were not “helping them in household chores”. It’s like – “Honey since you didn’t do the dishes last night, I am going out for a nice sex with Sanjeev down the street.” So the new math today is – Dishes Vs Sex – now.
Meeting someone new on the app is exciting for these women and the good thing for them is that the app takes care of privacy and safety.
The research also indicated that many homosexuals who were forced into traditional marriages are finding the same sex partners outside their marriage via this app.
Why extra-marital affairs?
That the ways and thinking are changing is visible from we in India look at sex and marriage now. One respondent on Quora says this about cheating.
We want to be beside our husbands in other times, but in bed we want other bulls. So it’s not really cheating. I will call it independence, we do not have any problem if they do with other ladies.
The “bored and monotonous” bit is probably true in this day and age of myriad interaction with the opposite sex, where as things like “don’t do household chores” may be a good excuse to fight the guilt. There is an excitement that these women are seeking and they are fine with quick and short term relationships. For example, the India Today survey of 2017 had studied 2000 women respondents and asked them about One-night stand.
Out of 2000 women surveyed, most belonging to upper and middle classes, about one-third said one night stands were perfectly alright. Many have had it. Many look forward to it.
The main arena for “forbidden” sexual relationships is workplace. The 2018 survey found that the ideas on office-sex have been changing.
So let’s break the silence behind the modern workplace, check out how the numbers stack up. “Do you think it’s alright for co-workers to engage in sexual relations?” “No,” say the majority, but it’s not a simple majority: 1 in every 2 people surveyed (or 56%) says “no”, led primarily by women (62%). But men seem to be foundering: as many men say colleagues should be allowed to have sex (50%) as those who oppose it. And here’s where it gets really interesting. Most people (58%) think that just 10 per cent of their colleagues have had sex with a colleague. But, in fact, three times more (or 28%) have had flings with colleagues. In an answer that will probably cause some disquiet to human resource professionals, sex between bosses and subordinates seems to be the norm: of the 33 per cent men who have had sex with colleagues, 57 per cent had an affair with subordinates. Of the 22 per cent women who have had sex, 61 per cent got involved with the boss. At least, that’s the message thrown up by the india today-MDRA sex survey at the workplace.
So, women have intercourse above their ranks and men go for women below them.
In another survey by Ashley Madison, 76% of Indian women and 61% of men don’t think that infidelity is a sin or immoral. And those indulging in extra-marital sex, overwhelmingly think it benefits their current marriage and improve their marital relationship! In fact in the Ashley Madison study, 81% of men and 68% women said extra-marital flings had a very positive impact on their marriages.
Interestingly one Indian short film on extra-marital affair has clocked over 3.5 million views!
So, these studies share an interesting finding – that Extra-marital sexual relationships not just co-exist with the traditional arranged marriages but seem to even positively complement them.
And, the new tech-driven eco-system is helping the people who do tread on this road to help hide their indiscretions completely, and since how thinking has changed, those who even get caught, it is not the end of their marital road.
Chances are that this percentage of those who have never been caught will grow higher.